Why the Cubs lose...

I finally figured it out. The reason the Cubs lose is because of Zane. Well... Not just Zane but people like him. They can'y overcome the pecimism. The Cubs are like New York City in Ghostbusters 2, except no one has come along with a statue covered in slime charged with good energy. In the immortal words of Ray Zalinsky via TommyBoy, "Good, step one is identifying the problem..." Um... does anyone know where I can get a giant staue of a teddy bear and a shit load of slime? Oh, and a copy of Eddie Murphy's classic Party All The Time?
Here I come Cubbies! Tyler to the rescue!

P.S.
FOFF Zane.